Know Your Why’s

We hear it all the time, “know your why”. When it comes to starting a business, a band, a new endeavor of any sort. Know your why for getting married and starting a family. Know your why behind your mission. Know the reason why you keep showing up. 

Here’s the problem though, that many of us deal with: we don’t know where our why is. 

We have the passion, the zeal, the magnetism, the confidence and boldness — all things that stem from an impactful past experience. These are good whys, for sure, but they’re exhaustive in nature to rely on alone. So we gotta find the real-deal why; the quiet and peaceful why; the steady why. The why that motivates you to keep showing up without your own willful summoning. It’s the why that draws you up and out of bed without you thinking twice.

That why. 

Where is it? 

Cause the truth is, that why, because it is peaceful, steady, and not so in your face, is easy to lose sight of if you’re not careful. If you don’t have good structure or solid boundaries in your life. If you struggle to prioritize what’s most important. That why, is the one that gets overlooked when life gets loud. It’s the why you need most when life gets loud. 

If you’re stuck, in a functional freeze, everything feels chaotic — you’re out of touch with that why. Take a moment and reflect, because you can feel the imbalance. Being high on the loud and charismatic why (nothing wrong with this by the way) without that calm and peaceful why will give you a sense of “what is this all for?” Only because the noise you make, while necessary to market/get heard/etc, is a means to draw necessary attention, while the calm why is about leaning into service, your work, your craft — the intimate part about why you do what you do. The calm why is the quiet force that all those loud whys stand on — it’s the why of the heart. 

Don’t get me wrong, you need both — but you need balance among them. Likely, you’ll only have a few quiet whys, while you’ll have several loud whys. Just remember the order of the building blocks. 

Taking this concept a step further into personal and career development, artistry and mastery — if you’ve lost sight, don’t know, or are stuck with blind spots of the mind which cover up your calm and quiet why — what do you think that means? It means we’re cut off from reaching our full potential. It means we are out of reach and may risk remaining out of reach until we can gain awareness of that critical why of the heart. 

The why that provides patience.

The why that provides kindness.

The why that does not boast, is not envy, and is not arrogant.

The why that isn’t selfish, irritable or resentful. 

The why that believes, hopes and endures through anything. 

Where is that why in your life?

That’s the why that will keep you going and keep you showing up. 

It’s a marathon, not a sprint. A dance. A game. 

You do not need to be perfect. You need to be human. 

To be human means to be connected. If your head starts to get in the clouds, make sure one foot is on the ground. Maybe you only have one foot, or prosthetic limbs, or you have just your waist, or four solid wheels, or two hands to walk you around — you get the idea. 

Stay here. Stay connected. Stay human. 

All you need is your why and the life of your dreams will fall into place. Believe it. You got another 365 days starting tonight at midnight to keep showing up.

Make it count. Not to prove yourself. Make it count because of your why. 

-B